They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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