Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
