Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
