we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
