she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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