i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
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