i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
they're like a gay fantastic four
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
