That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
