In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
