i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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