Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Randomize
