Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
