I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
