Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
