i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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