Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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