Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
He passed out mid-signature
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Randomize
