I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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