belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
