would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I need a beard to bite.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
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