oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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