batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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