My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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