i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
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