im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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