She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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