YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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