Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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