OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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