Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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