hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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