The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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