Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
