Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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