i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
