Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i just google imaged poop.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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