this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Randomize
