Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
