You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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