so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize