ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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