I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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