Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
