Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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