he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
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