all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
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