What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize
