maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
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I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
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NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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