either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
