escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote